Finding My Voice

Jesus please let my application I am filling out be accepted.  I silently prayed to Jesus as I filled out the online Application to be a part of  the book launch team for When A Woman Finds Her Voice . After  wholeheartedly praying I left the outcome in His hands.  

I was ecstatic when upon checking my emails , I discovered that I was accepted to  be a part of Jo Ann Fores Book Launch team for her upcoming book , When A Woman Finds Her Voice!  The voice I had longed to use since I was a little girl was finally going to be heard. Although I was doing a Happy Dance to celebrate my acceptance another emotion lurked under the surface. The emotion was Fear.

Starting with my early childhood, fear had buried my voice deep within me.  There were many times in my younger years when I longed to use my voice . I desired so strongly to be able to trust someone  and tell them what was going on in my life.

Although I had been told throughout my life by teachers, parents and grown ups to speak up if someone was touching me inappropriately. Fear kept my voice silent. With each day ,I lost a bit more of my voice. Eventually I began to speak lies into myself ,such as those things didn’t happen to you and if you tell anyone they will not believe you.

At this point in my story you might be asking yourself, what would keep a little girl from using her voice! As I am typing ,  I am taking deep breaths and silently affirming to myself that its okay to use my voice and tell you why I buried my own voice and spoke lies to myself .

Details are not important , but in this instance help to explain why I had such an intense fear of speaking my truth. Imagine a young child who is trying to fall asleep and someone quietly lays behind her and wont let her get up . She attempted to leave her resting place because something in her soul knew that in that moment things were not going to be good. After attempting to fight and vocalize her displeasure and need for help , her head is violently slammed into her own pillow with the words If you tell anyone I will kill you! At that moment the little girl gave up the losing fight and what should never happen to a little girl happened . That night her innocence was taken and so was her voice.

As you may have figured out, I am that little girl all grown up! I have found my voice and am determined to use it. I feel it is important to use my voice to let women know, they are not alone . That they too can find their voice . Hidden underneath all the pain is a beautiful voice that longs to be heard. Will you bravely step out of your comfort zone and discover your voice that was never meant to be stifled ?

I am linking up with an amazing group of women from Jo Ann’s book launch team. Each of us are sharing how we are discovering and sharing our own voicesJo Ann Fore250472_4899259245238_1863239880_n

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16 thoughts on “Finding My Voice

  1. I am so glad you found your voice! What a voice it is. And I am so sorry that you had that happen when you were a child. No child should have that happen and yet too many of us have faced it. Bless you for being here and being on the launch team!

  2. To the beautifully brave author of this post…thank you for sharing. Giving others the courage to share with your written words.
    May the ‘lost little girl’ deep within each woman be ‘found’ even as she ‘finds her voice’.

  3. Oh precious friend, how my heart aches for that little girl lost. I am so very sorry. Yet, I find such joy in your tender heart that so willingly pours into the countless hearts of others that are still hurting, the others who are seeking the courage to speak up, to find the healing that waits. Thank you for modeling brave-hearted courage. Thank you for using your voice.

  4. My heart just breaks for that ‘little girl’ within you. So many women still carry their inner childhood voice buried deep within, waiting to resurface to find hope, and healing. I pray that you continue to allow God to use you to reach out to those women who need to hear your story, your voice. It’s in hearing your voice that will help them have the courage to find their own voice and begin their journey of healing.
    blessings,
    Gay Idle @CaptiveHeart

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